Today, I am going to a bookstore.
I haven’t been to a bookstore since November 2018, which in bookworm years is like half an eternity.
I’m very excited and have been planning this bookstore trip for about two weeks now. The nearest bookstore is about 35 minutes away, which is just far enough that strategery must be deployed for Maximum Bookstore Enjoyment.
Today, I’m sharing my wisdom on Bookstore Ventures. Listen up, kids.
Step One: Carve out a good chunk of time (aka: release yourself of all responsibility for at least 7.5 hours).
Take the day off from work. Clear your schedule. Make it clear to your loved ones that if they need anything, you’ll be at the bookstore and thus otherwise engaged for quite some time.
People will be sad that you are unreachable during your Bookstore Venture. That’s okay. They’ll live.
Step Two: Conduct reconnaissance and gather provisions.
It’s important to know what sort of bookstore you’re walking into and what amenities the surrounding area has to offer.
For instance, you’ll likely need some coffee, so make sure there’s either a coffee shop inside the bookstore or that there’s a coffee shop on the way too the bookstore. (Also, I should warn you that a bookstore without a coffee shop should be regarded as Shady.)
If there are no proper eateries within thirty seconds of the bookstore, pack snacks.
Step Three: Select the proper wardrobe.
You can’t go to a bookstore wearing just anything.
You need something comfy, stylish, and possibly bookish. If you have bookish merch of any kind, this where you break it out. Wear the Out of Print t-shirt, the Storiarts headband (anybody want to buy me a Dracula headband?), the bookworm socks. Or, go the fandom route.
home to the bookstore. Such an occasion requires the proper attire.
Step Four: Leave the
dead weight non-bookish people at home.
If you are a mother and have offspring, leave the offspring at home.
It’s also best if you leave family and/or friends at home who may in any way try to rush the Bookstore Venture.
If they are not a fellow Bookworm, they will only detract from the Venture by….
a) complaining about your mood, attire, etc.
b) getting bored in the bookstore
c) asking if you’re almost done
e) constantly checking their phone
f) sighing more
g) asking, “Don’t you already have enough books?”
Step Five: Locate and take pictures of all the books you already own by authors you already know and love and post them on Instagram.
If I need to explain this why this step is imperative, you clearly have not been exposed to the #bookstagram community, and the very nature of your Bookworm-ness has been called into question.
Step Six: Angst over which books you’re going to purchase.
You know the feeling. There are so many good options and too little money and shelf space.
You take books off the shelves only to reshelve them only to take them off again. You read blurbs and first chapters and stare at covers and recheck your bank account and reshelve the books.
You don’t know which books to buy, which ones are the most essential to your towering TBR pile.
Buy the box set? Or get the YA retelling?
Or choose the book you’d never heard of before today but has a beautiful cover and a mouth-watering blurb?
And what about that special edition of your favorite classic?
Or go with the hardcover that you have to take out a mortgage to buy, but my goodness it’s gorgeous?
How can you possibly choose?
Step Seven: Buy some books. Engage in some “I just bought books” merrymaking. Die happy.
That’s how it’s done.
p.s. – today is Katie Grace’s birthday!! Happy Birthday, Katie!!
p.p.s. – that Avengers: Endgame trailer, amiright?
p.p.p.s. – I clearly spent more time looking for gifs than I did writing this post.