Posted by

Posted on

December 22, 2015

Posted under

Comments

How to Wrap a Gift (for the exceptionally challenged)

The days until Christmas have dwindled into single digits. People are running around like chickens with their heads cut off trying to get last minute shopping in. Children stalk the presents under the tree. Mothers angst over the big Christmas meal. Sweethearts kiss under the mistletoe. Blah, blah, blah.

This post isn’t about any of that.

I’ll do some real advent posts next year, but for 2015, this shall be the only Christmas post I write.

I think that this is an issue that a lot of people struggle with. I mean, there are those few out in the world who have this down and make the rest of us want to gag, but I think that this doesn’t come naturally to most of us. It’s a real, deep struggle.

I am, of course, talking about gift wrapping.

how to wrap a gift (for the exceptionally challenged) So, here is a four-step tutorial on how to wrap a Christmas gift, and because I am exceptionally challenged, this should be suitable even for even the most inept.

Step 1: Assemble your supplies

Find your wrapping paper. If you cannot locate any wrapping paper in the house, you must venture out of doors and buy some from the nearest store. Choosing the correct wrapping paper isn’t that big of a deal; all you have to do is make sure it’s pretty. However, I recommend paper with one side as a grid because this makes cutting a relatively straight line a world easier.

Find your scissors. This can be difficult. Pull out all of your drawers, and if you still are unable to locate them, dump the contents of the drawers on the floor in a fit of frustration. (It helps.) Even in a pinch, DO NOT USE KITCHEN SCISSORS UNDER ANY CIRCUMASTANCES. I cannot emphasize this enough. Using kitchen scissors will only elevate the already high risk of mental breakdown.

Find your tape. Don’t buy unproven, cutsy holiday tape. Even if it says it’s “specifically for” gift wrapping, don’t believe it. (It’s a trap!) If you already possess trustworthy holiday tape, go ahead and use that, but otherwise, buy some good old, clear scotch tape. For the inept, this is a must because you will most likely end up using obscene amounts of tape in an effort to wrap your gifts, and cute tape will make it look more like even more of a mess than it already is. For the advanced, use this holiday tape at your own risk.

Find your fine-tipped Sharpie. This is for labeling your gifts once they are wrapped. It is best to track this bad boy down at this time so that you can label your gifts as soon as they are wrapped. Use fat Sharpies at your own risk.

Pro-tip: never let your mom “borrow” any of your supplies as the odds of seeing those supplies ever again are extremely slim.

Step Two: Wrap the gift.

Pick the gift you wish to wrap first. Usually, it is best to start with something fairly simple like putting the gift in an Amazon shipping box. Find a flat surface to be your operating table. DO NOT USE A BED. This is the worst place to wrap gifts because beds usually an odd height and squishy which usually means lots of unwanted rips in your paper. I highly recommend the floor instead of a table because you will likely be sinking to the ground in a heap of tears at some point anyway.

With your supplies assembled and your gift chosen, you can begin wrapping the gift. Begin by unrolling a portion of your paper and placing the gift in the center. Practice wrapping the gift before you cut. Figure out how much paper you will need, and then cut the appropriate amount of paper with your scissors.

Start folding the paper around your box and tape as needed.

At this point, you will discover that you have too much paper, so find your scissors again and trim the paper.

Eat some chocolate and start folding the paper around your box and tape as needed.

At this point, you will realize that you trimmed too much paper and do not have enough to cover the box.

Drink some wine and start over.

After three tries, you have the right amount of paper cut. You’ll start folding your paper around your box, but when you reach for your tape, it is gone. Pin the box and the folded paper to your chest and feel around for the missing tape. Once you have rediscovered your tape, use your free hand and teeth to get a piece of the tape. During the struggle of getting a piece of tape, you have ripped your paper and dropped your box.

Cry for a while and start over.

After failing to wrap the box two more times, you have finally successfully (more-or-less) wrapped the box! Congratulations!

Step Three: Label the gift

Whip out your Sharpie and prepare to finish this! At this point, it has been two hours since you put the gift in the box and began wrapping. Now, you no longer remember what the gift is or who it is for.

Take some time to throw some things and cry, and then go through your gift inventory to see what is missing. Theoretically, the missing item will be the item in your box.

Wipe your eyes, steady your hand, and carefully write the recipient’s name and then your name on the paper. Do this SLOWLY. If you do end up making a mess of writing the recipient’s name, find some labels and put it over your mistake and try again.

Step Four: Repeat Steps One – Three as necessary.

There you have it!

This is generally how gift wrapping goes for me, and so I wanted to share my process with you all. :) :)

Merry Christmas!

Posted by

Rosalie Valentine

Posted on

December 14, 2015

Posted under

Writing

Comments

16 Comments

3 Ways to Glorify God in Your Writing

Recently, I came to realize that I tend to compartmentalize. I like to keep God in His box, and I like to keep writing in its own little box, far away from God.

I’m not saying I’ve written things that are graphically sinful, completely unwholesome, and rife with heresy because I haven’t. I just tend to be buddy-buddy with God during my devotions and talk with Him some throughout the day, but when I light my writing candle, I tend to shut everything out. Including God. I’m not so much, “God, don’t interfere with my writing!” as I am “You can go away now.” Both are bad.

3 ways glorify god 2 Anyway, I’ve thought up some ways to bring God into my writing. Or rather, bring my writing into God. I don’t want to write just stories. I want my writing to be a reflection of my love for God. I want my writing to glorify Him. I want Him to use my writing to turn hearts to the Truth.

So, here are three ways to glorify God in your writing.

Pray before you write.

This is the time when you’ve got your notebook, maps, and all other supplies. You’ve lit your writing candle, and the blank page blinks at you.
Stop and pray. It doesn’t have to be long (it can be though, if you want it). It’s just bowing your head and having some words with the Creator the universe. There’s lots you can say. Lots you can ask.

Thank Him for the gift of writing. He’s the one that gave it to you.

Thank Him for your creativity. He’s the one that built you with it.

Thank Him for the sunshine (or the starlight).

Ask Him to guide you as you write.

Ask Him to help you with a troublesome plot point.

Ask Him to help you glorify Him.

Pray that He will enjoy the time writing with you.

Pray that it will be a sweet time of fellowship.

Basically, invite Him into your writing time. If there’s some sin that’s come between you and Him, confess it. Your writing won’t glorify Him much if you aren’t in communion with Him. If you want your writing to truly be an offering to Him, a sweet fragrance to Him, you need to start with Him.

So, take two minutes before you start scratching away at the page or plucking away at the keys, and talk with God.

Read Scripture before you write.

If you have a key verse or Scripture passage that inspires your writing, read it a couple times. It can be for your writing as a whole or your WIP.

I understand not all writing projects will have a key verse, but I encourage you to find one that reflects one of your main themes. And for writing as a whole (for life as whole, actually) I encourage you to pick a verse (or verses) that is your anthem.

For instance, my verse for writing as a whole is 1 Corinthians 10:31 which says, “Whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” I want the glory of God to be the goal of my writing. I want to write to glorify Him. So I decided that 1 Corinthians 10:31 would be my writing verse.

An example of a specific project verse is Matthew 5:14-16 which says, “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before other, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father Who is in heaven.” This is my primary passage for Flickering Lights.

Once you have your verse(s), read it before you write. Put it on an index card or write it in your notebook. Keep it somewhere accessible, and read it before you write. It doesn’t have to be aloud, but really think about the words. You’ll have it memorized soon enough.

This isn’t supposed to be some ritual to empower your writing. It’s supposed to turn your heart to God and let Him move in your writing.

Write for God, not yourself.

So much, I hear the advice, “Write for yourself! When you stop relying on other people for your motivation to write, that’s when you write more. That’s when you’ll stay true to yourself.”

I say no.

Write for God.

That’s when you’ll stay true to Him because honestly, this isn’t about you. At least it shouldn’t be. If you truly want to glorify Him, your writing (and everything else you have, for that matter) will be about Him and for Him. When He’s your inspiration and motivation, you will glorify Him.

There you have it!

These aren’t tricks or guarantees. But I’ve been using them for a few weeks now, and it has changed my mindset on writing. I hope that these ideas/practices are as helpful to you as they have been to me.

What are some of the ways you work to glorify God in your writing?

Posted by

Rosalie Valentine

Posted on

November 16, 2015

Posted under

Uh, This is Random

Comments

5 Comments

To All the Brave Wrimos

This is for you brave Wrimos out there who are hammering away at your very own 50k (or more, if you’re one of Those).

We’re here at Day 16, just over the halfway hump. (Well, for you nocturnal writers, it’s still Day 15, but for all the rest of you, we’re in the early breaths of Day 16.)

Some of you are well beyond your goals, glorying at 40k or more. Congrats! You are officially insane and/or amazing. Ya’ll can stop reading now. This for the fairly normal peeps (fairly being the operative word).

Some of you are struggling, having fallen days behind because your Muse abandoned you when daylight dawned on Day 3. Or you lost your plot shortly after 10k. Or suddenly, your book is about some minor character you didn’t know existed until twenty pages in. Or you got a late start and are still playing catch-up, but the dog died and the baby is throwing up everywhere. Or your keyboard bid you farewell, and you’ve written the last 3k on your basic flip phone.

Regardless of the details, whatever has befallen is dragging you down. You’re wondering if it’s worth the stiff fingers and crusty eyes. You don’t know how much longer your body can operate on coffee and Cheetos. You’re thinking about changing careers so that you can synthesize pure, injectable caffeine. You’re thinking about quitting.

Don’t.

Please, don’t.

I’m here to tell you never give up, never surrender.

I did NaNo last year. I’ve been where you are. The stress of normal life compounded by the story that you’re fighting to get on paper. The days when you to bed two hours before you have to get up. The nights when you’ve got a load of homework, and still have to try to reach your word count. The afternoons when you’re falling asleep at work.

While I’m not slaying 50,000 words this month, I’m here, at 1:30 am, popping Hershey’s chocolate nuggets like they’re oxygen between gulps of my sparkling grape juice. I’ve already tanked down on all my gummy bears, and I’m in that weird half-light place that’s just before hysteria. I’m doing this as a show of solidarity and to tell you not to give up.

Regardless of the outcome, you’ve endeavored to do something that makes most people I know blanch with fear. If you write 120k or 20k this month, you wrote something. You tried. My point is, get an A for effort. Don’t write 20k because you give up. Write 20k because it’s the best you’ve got right now.

So what your plot wandered off? Rough drafts are supposed to be a time of discovery. When you lose your plot, you find new loves, new villains, new victories, new losses, new places.

Here’s what makes a breakneck rough draft fearless: revisions and editing can fix just about anything.

So, kill the character.

Make those two fall in love.

Have them lose that battle.

This the best time to bold and incomprehensible and wild.

So make it so.

Finish it.

Sincerely,

Rosalie, the girl in the fox hole

A Note to Followers: Some of you may have gathered that I’m not doing NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month, but who ever says the whole thing?) this year. For those of you hadn’t gathered thus: I’m not doing NaNoWriMo this year.

Time itself has been against me for a few months now, and if I did NaNo, well… the world would crumble around my ears. Trust me, I’m bummed. On the bummer scale, it’s like when Frodo got stabbed with a Morgul blade on Weathertop. Yeah, it’s that bad. I can feel the poison turning me into a wraith and everything.

Anyway, “normal” posts are returning to a fox hole near you.

Posted by

Rosalie Valentine

Posted on

November 2, 2015

Posted under

Uh, This is Random

Comments

5 Comments

#Called2Speak for the Lost

What makes you want to speak out?

Today I have the honor of participating in #Called2Speak Blog Hop which is promoting the dystopian novel, A Time to Speak by the fabulous Nadine Brandes (the awesome book two in the Out of Time series which released October 16 so you can go buy it now). On the #Called2Speak hop, we’re supposed to speak out about something we’re passionate about.

P.S. – there’s a giveaway at the end! :) :)

I thought about a bunch of different topics I could write about, but nothing knocked me off my feet. I’m passionate about a variety of things, but none of them… fit. I wasn’t called to speak about any of them.

Instead, after praying and more thinking, it turns out that I’m called to speak about something I’m not passionate about. I’m called to speak for the Lost.

Who are the Lost?

The Lost are those without Christ.

I’m called to speak for the Lost because I’m not the only one lacking a passion for them. In fact, I’d have to say that this dispassion is widespread and worsening day by day.

Honestly, I don’t really care about the Lost. Not truly. If I loved the Lost, I would share my Hope with them; I would share Christ with them. But I don’t. I act kind and convince myself that showing them Christ is more important, more effective, than telling them Who the Truth is. If I’m nice and smile, they’ll figure it out. No need for me to bring Him up and make things awkward. *shudder* We wouldn’t want that. No, no. I’ll stick to my sweetness and “glow,” and if they ask about Him – and I’m secretly hoping they won’t – I’ll figure something out. Yeah, this is a great plan. Osmosis all the way.

After twelve – almost thirteen – years of these genius tactics, I’ve lead a grand total of zero people to Christ. What, no applause?

The question is, am I going to throw away the next thirteen years “reaching” the Lost this way?

Now, some may think, “Come on. It’s not that big of a deal. If God wants them to get saved, they will eventually.”

Um, no. No matter how I slice it, according to Scripture, sharing the Gospel is a nonnegotiable.

In Matthew 28:19-20, Jesus told the disciples (and us), “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

Step one in disciple-making: share the Gospel. But I’m not. I’m not obeying this command, which begs the question, how much do I love Christ? He said that if I love Him, I’ll obey His commands (John 14:15).

And then there’s Acts 1:8 which says: “But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you, and you will be My witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria and to the end of the earth.”

To witness is “to bear witness to; testify to; give or afford evidence of” according to the dictionary. If I’m God’s witness, I should be declaring His Gospel. But I’m not.

I find the worst part isn’t that I don’t love the Lost. I don’t think it’s even that I’m being disobedient. The worst part is that I don’t care that I don’t love Christ enough to obey this command or that I don’t truly want to see souls saved to Christ.

There’s something desperately wrong with my heart. I can rattle off a list of excuses. Just watch and see.

I’m not elegant when I talk.

I’m haven’t studied enough to accurately share the Gospel.

I’m not brave.

But ultimately, I don’t want to.

And that right there is so many different shades of weak and wrong.

God says, “For it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you.” – Matthew 10:20. That axes my whiny “I’m not elegant” excuse.

God says, “But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect.” – 1 Peter 3:15. This command throws my lazy “I haven’t studied” right out the window.

God says, “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” – 2 Timothy 1:7. That demolished my whimpering “I’m not brave.” Because of Christ, I don’t have to be, shouldn’t be, afraid.

So, where is my love for the Lost? How do I get a passion for them?

It’s simple.

If I truly love my Lord, He will give me wild love for the Lost. There’s hope for me yet. He can overcome my weakness, and He can strip away the selfishness in my soul if I want Him to, if I ask Him to, if I let Him.

I don’t think I’m the only one who struggles with loving the Lost. I don’t think I’m the only one who has come up with a list longer than the Nile as to why I don’t, can’t, won’t share the Gospel.

But, friends, we’ve got to change.

This is not how it’s supposed to be.

I want to close with a quote from David Platt’s book Radical (which you can enter for a chance to win here): “Every saved person this side of heaven owes the Gospel to every lost person this side of hell.”

Tell me honestly. Do you love the Lost?

What happens when you live longer than you wanted to?

Parvin Blackwater wanted to die, but now she’s being called to be a leader. The only problem is, no one wants to follow.

The Council uses Jude’s Clock-matching invention to force “new-and-improved” Clocks on the public. Those who can’t afford one are packed into boxcars like cattle and used for the Council’s purposes.

Parvin and Hawke find themselves on a cargo ship of Radicals headed out to sea. What will the Council do to them? And why are people suddenly dying before their Clocks have zeroed-out?

Book Two in the “Out of Time” series.

Read about the first book, A Time to Die, here.

–

To learn more about the author, Nadine, you can check out the interview I had with her last week and enter for a chance to win paperback copies of A Time to Die and Radical by David Platt, or you can visit her website.

–

ALSO, what makes you want to speak out? If you want to participate in the #Called2Speak Blog Hop, just write up a post about whatever you are passionate about, and tag it with #Called2Speak!

The Giveaway!!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Okay, I’m not going to lie. The awesomeness of this giveaway is severely stunted because my blog won’t show the Rafflecopter widget (blast you, blog vs rafflecopter feud!). If you click on the link, you will discover an opportunity to win signed (SIGNED!!!!) copies of BOTH A Time to Die and A Time to Speak. Guys, do it. These books are twelve different kinds of incredible.

Now, to here is a list of all the other bloggers who have participated in the #Called2Speak Blog Hop so far. Go ahead and check out what they’re passionate about by following the links below. :)

9.28.15 – Gretchen Engel

9.30.15 – Nadine Brandes

10.01.15 – Jason Joyner

10.05.15 – Gretchen Engel (part 2)

10.06.15 – Tricia Mingerink

10.08.15 – Gretchen Engel (Scriblerians)

10.09.15 – Emilie Hendryx

10.11.15 – Janeen Ippolito

10.12.15 – Zachary D Totah

10.14.15 – Brittany Valentine

10.15.15 – Andrew Swearingen

10.17.15 – Megan Besing

10.19.15 – Angel Roman

10.20.15 – Charles Franklin

10.21.15 – Lisa Godfrees

10.23.15 – Shantelle Hannu

10.27.15 – Natalie Walters

10.29.15 – The Artist Librarian

11.02.15 – Rosalie Valentine

11.17.15 – Amanda Fender

//widget-prime.rafflecopter.com/launch.js

Posted by

Rosalie Valentine

Posted on

September 28, 2015

Posted under

Books

Comments

10 Comments

A Time to Speak Review (5/5)

* I received a free copy of A Time to Speak from the wonderful Nadine Brandes in exchange for my honest review. *

*****************WARNING!!!!! If you have NOT read A Time to Die, read no further! If you HAVE read A Time to Die, read without fear of spoilers!!**********************

“I’ve been robbed of my death. A date was set, a coffin prepared, and a grave dug in the earth, yet I breathe against my own will as my brother is lowered six feet down. The smooth wood coffin displays the best of Father’s carpentry skills. Did he originally carve it for me?”

Parvin Blackwater was supposed to die. She was ready to die. She wanted to die. But she didn’t. The clock she shared with her twin zeroed out, and he died while she survived – much to the chagrin of just about everyone. While battling grief, Parvin tries to protect Willow, schemes of how to rescue Elm, and tries to adjust to the strange place her home has become. And the faith and God Who carried her through the West seem hard to reach with Reid and Jude dead, Jude’s clock-matching invention in the hands of the Council, and Elm starving inside the Wall. When her situation goes from bad to worse, Parvin is called to lead, but how can she lead if no one wants to follow?

I literally had no words when I finished A Time to Speak at 1:30 in the morning. I just stared at my Kindle questioning my existence. I’m not even kidding.

When I began reading, I drank up the first lines slowly, appreciating the rich detail and sinking slowly back into the world of A Time to Die. But I couldn’t go slowly for long, for peril was quick to rear its heart-pounding head, and I was soon swimming through pages as quickly as possible. It was as if I was getting reacquainted with the old friends who I had come to love in A Time to Die.

I had liked A Time to Die Parvin, but I loved A Time to Speak Parvin. She was amazing, and it wasn’t because she was so brave or always made the right choice. I loved that she moving forward and making progress in every aspect. Her character arc continues in a beautiful way, and I can’t wait to see where it ends! Also, the reader gets to meet several new characters who add adversity or encouragement to the story while Ms. Brandes continues to flesh out the veterans from the first book.

Next to strike me was Solomon Hawke, Jude’s brother. I just… I mean…wow. He’s simply amazing. I was so glad to get to know him better than I had in A Time to Die, but I can’t quite put my finger on why I like him so much! He’s kind, gentle, and wise! Just… read the book and find out for yourself. I can’t tell anymore coherently and without spoilers.

One part of this book that gripped me was actually fairly small. It was the relationship between Parvin and her brother’s widow, Tawny. It was fragmented and difficult; it was real. Family isn’t all flowers, and Parvin’s family is no exception.

Ms. Brandes continued to build on her expansive world in new and exciting ways! While the technology was intuitive and interesting, the landscapes that she paints are stunning! I wish I could say more, but I’d give spoilers! :(

Now, A Time to Die wasn’t a walk in the park and neither is A Time to Speak. It’s intense. The characters suffer a lot, and the body count is pretty high. However, Ms. Brandes doesn’t go into much gross detail; she shows enough for the reader to think, “Oh, wow. Oh, no. No, no, that can’t be good.” or “No, no, don’t do that! That’ll make it worse!”

Also, the stakes are much higher than they were in A Time to Die, but Ms. Brandes weaves in enough humor that the tension doesn’t kill the reader. I’m alive as a testament.

All of this was incredible. I love the style. I love the characters. I love the story. I love the conflict. I love the world. I love the detail. But it’s the fierce message that I love the most. A Time to Speak is about taking a leap of faith, stepping out, speaking for those with no voice, and trusting God with a wild faith.

It’s the idea that drawing near to God won’t solve problems, but that when you draw near to God, He carries you through the trials of life, fueling you as you do His will. I’ve been a Christian for almost twelve years now, and I’ve been told that very thing again and again all my life. But it never came home until I was reading about a girl with one hand who is so physically weak but called on God with faith that He would provide in His perfect will. Blast you, spoilers! I want to say more! I’ll just say that though Parvin has never existed beyond the imaginations and hearts of Nadine Brandes and her readers, the message she bears and the example she gives is clearer and more tangible to me than most deep spiritual discussions and complicated explanations.

When I finished A Time to Speak, I was exhausted but not from lack of sleep. I was exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster. I was exhausted from the strain of the story. I was exhausted from the spiritual hammer that continues ringing in my head.

A Time to Speak is the evidence that books can affect change in the reader. It carries an important message, and part of why it’s so impactful is that it’s wrapped in a well-written, witty, exquisite package. Therefore, I give A Time to Speak five out five wonderstruck, sleepless stars and a PG-13 rating.

Find it on Amazon and Goodreads!

Penprints

God. Life. Stories.

Yearly Archives: 2015

How to Wrap a Gift (for the exceptionally challenged)