Category Archives: Uh, This is Random

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September 11, 2018

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My Dear Future, [an open letter]

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My Dear Future,

I do not know what you hold. You are the great unknown. You strike fear into my heart. I lose sleep. I bite my fingernails to nothing.

People ask me questions about you. I hate it when they do because then I must admit that I simply do not know you, my own dearest, daunting Future.

You are the next three days.

You are the next three months.

You are the next three years.

You are the next three decades.

Oh, my dear Future. I see so many painful inevitabilities. I see in you unexpected death, broken relationships, rejections, heartache, tears, confusion, new failings, and goodbyes that will break me.

And what is still more frightening is the knowledge that you, my dear Future, quickly become my Present. In what seems like a single pulse of my heart, tomorrow will become today, and next year will become this year.

I will make goals that I will not meet. I will let relationships dissolve. I will watch people I once knew grow and change from a distance. I will make promises only to break them. I will start days with joy and singing and end them with silence.

But I try to put on a smile when it comes to you, my dear Future. I make my plans, answer the questions that just won’t stop, and pretend I know what this whole thing is about.

I don’t know how to talk about you, my fear-drenched Future. I don’t know how to ask for help, am terrified to show weakness, for it seems that once people realize just how much I don’t know, there will be blood in the water. I fear rumors and raised-eyebrows and being seen for what I really am.

But now I see how I’ve gotten this all so wrong. I see that I’ve been following the wrong stars in my thinking. It is, as it turns out, ridiculously simple (but then I am often ridiculously slow).

Here it is: you, my dear Future, are not about me.

My Savior King is the centerpiece, the end of you, the sum of you, my dear Future.

And the fear I have for you, my dear Future, is treason. The fear I have for you—the kind that changes the way I think and make decisions all on an axis of self—should not belong to you. My Savior King is the only One with a rightful claim to my fear, my attention, my decision-making—all on an axis of Jesus.

In so many ways, you are unknown, my dear Future. Unknown to me. But not to my Savior King. And when I am afraid, I can trust in him, can remember who he is. Because my Savior King is the Most High God, the Lord of hosts, King Jesus.

And you, oh Future, hold only my good and his glory.

One day, someday in you, my dear Future, he will return in his glory, and on that day, he will be known as God and King in all the earth.

That day seems so far off, but it is the most real thing I know of you, my dear Future. And it is that one known, promised day that must define every breath drawn into my lungs.

The goals for my near future—the days leading up to my Savior King’s return—are all at once fuzzy and in sharp focus: love God; love people; worship; make disciples; magnify my Maker.

These are my next three days.

These are my next three months.

These are my next three decades.

These are the rest of my life.

And, no, my dear Future, I don’t know what that will always look like—where or with whom. And, yes, I know I will make many mistakes. But I am by no means significant enough or powerful enough to derail the plans of my Savior King.

And when the goodbyes break me, he will lift my head. And when I fail in new ways and all the old ways too, he will pick me up and remind me that his grace covers me. And when relationships fall apart, he will tell me that love covers all offenses.

And, yes, dear Future, I am still afraid of you, but my Savior King does not condemn me for even this treason.

Instead, every day, bit by bit, he calls me to grow more and more confident in him. Every day he gives me what I need to walk on water until one day I will look at you, my dear Future, with no fear or dread. I will be treasonous no more for I will remember always that the greatness of my Savior King knows no equal.

My dear Future, my hopes and dreams live in you.

So I will build my life—this short existence on this pale blue dot—upon the Cornerstone. And he—not I—will bring to pass things more splendid than I can imagine, treasures of silver and gold that will echo into the eternity I spend with him.

My dear Future, I do not know most of what you hold, but that is okay.

With love,

Rosalie

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August 14, 2018

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7 Tips for Preparing for Church

A long while ago, I wrote a post musing about how I’m usually not ready to be in church.

It is high time that I share the follow-up post (aka: this post).

Disclaimer: Part of what’s taken so long to share this post is that I’m still not ready to be in church most of the time, even though I know “what it takes.” It’s hard to get ready, hard to work past the times when I’m just not feeling it or when my brain is scattered like seeds on the wind. So please know that I don’t often take my own advice.

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For me, preparing for corporate worship has broken down neatly into three primary sections: during the week, Saturday night, and lastly Sunday morning itself.

Let’s get started.

Part One: During the Week

  1. Have daily devotions during the week.

You know how in the spring, you go down to the lake (or the river or the pool or the ocean) for your first swim and the water is chilly at first? When you jump in, it takes you a few minutes to adjust—a few minutes of movement before you’re really enjoying yourself.

It’s not about getting out of the water to warm up before you jump in again. It’s about staying in the water until it’s natural and you get used to it and can even enjoy it. And the jumping in is easier the next time.

Devotions during the week are like staying in the water; they make the next Sunday—the next time you jump in—come more readily and naturally.

  1. When you pray for your pastor and his sermon prep during the week, pray also that you and your church would have ready hearts.

(This could be a no-brainer, but I tend to forget it. So I’m including it.)

We can do all the things we’re “supposed” to be ready for Sunday, but we actually have very little power to do anything. If the Holy Spirit isn’t there cutting and moving and blessing and exhorting no amount of ready or not will make any difference.

He’s the one who does all the heavy-lifting when it comes to being ready, and we have to humbly recognize that. We do the best we can to be ready, and we invite Him to do what we cannot.

Part Two: Saturday Night

  1. Unplug an hour or so before bed.

Unplug from social media. Unplug from the news. Unplug from the movies and TV. Unplug from novels and self-help books. Unplug from YouTube. Unplug from your current project—be it home improvements, a wood-working project, a piece of art, whatever.

We are an increasingly distracted people, yet we are to come undistracted before our holy God.

In his book 12 Ways Your Phone Is Changing You, Tony Reinke says this: “God feels distant because we are distracted. Yet he seeks us; he seeks our undivided attention.”

Unplugging from all these diversions helps sweep away the mental clutter. Sleep should come more easily, and your mind will be clearer come morning.

Replace the distractors with things that help focus your mind and heart on God and cultivate an appetite for him.

  1. Read the text.

Read last week’s sermon text and maybe even review your notes so that you’re oriented to what’s happening, especially if your pastor is in the middle of a series.

If possible, read this week’s sermon text. I’m sure your pastor would be delighted to share it with you if you ask him for it. Just shoot a quick text or email over to him and get a jump-start on the message. This, too, will help shift your mind and heart and get your oriented.

  1. Go to bed a little earlier.

Little kids aren’t the only ones who are crabby when they’re tired. And I’m guessing everyone has fought the awful fight to stay awake in a church service.

Get a bit more sleep by not staying up as late; the more rested you are, the more stable and engaged you will be. You’ll have more patience with your family and roommates, and you’ll also have more mental focus.

Part Three: Sunday Morning.

  1. Wake up 15 minutes earlier than you need to.

Yes, I just told you to get more sleep, and now I’m telling you to get up earlier. But bear with me because it’s just a few minutes, and if used well, they are well worth it.

Use this extra time to have a prayer time and read a Psalm or something. Let the first thing you do set the mood for the rest of the day. And then go shower, eat breakfast, and all that jazz.

  1. Stay unplugged.

Resist the urge to check your email or the news or your social medias. Keep the TV off.

In fact, turn your phone on silent.

Set apart your Sunday mornings and don’t get caught up on everything until after lunch.

Let’s drop a bookend on this post.

Sunday mornings are a battleground. Church is about worshiping the living God with other believers. It’s about getting refreshed and prepped for the week to go out and spread the gospel. We cannot waste our Sunday mornings. We cannot autopilot through church. We cannot passively drift.

Hopefully, this helps you as you try to go into Sunday morning ready for what God will do.

With love,

Rosalie

P.S. – Penprints posting days are officially moved from Mondays to Tuesdays, just so you know. Mondays have worked well for the past five years, but now I’m trying something different. Maybe I’ll tell you all about all the whys in a few months. :D

P.P.S. – my third publication—Unexpected—is out and about in the world!

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July 9, 2018

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Altars of Remembrance [the importance of looking back to see the faithfulness of God]

// When all the nation had finished passing over the Jordan, the LORD said to Joshua, “Take twelve men from the people, from each tribe a man, and command them, saying, ‘Take twelve stones from here out of the midst of the Jordan, from the very place where the priests’ feet stood firmly, and bring them over with you and lay them down in the place where you lodge tonight.’”

Then Joshua called the twelve men from the people of Israel, whom he had appointed, a man from each tribe. And Joshua said to them, “Pass on before the ark of the LORD your God into the midst of the Jordan, and take up each of you a stone upon his shoulder, according to the number of the tribes of the people of Israel, that this may be a sign among you. When your children ask in time to come, ‘What do these stones mean to you?’ then you shall tell them that the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the LORD. When it passed over the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. So these stones shall be to the people of Israel a memorial forever.” //

Joshua 4:1-7

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I remember my entire body going limp and a sensation of weightlessness.

I remember my arms floating out in front of me as confusion and shock flooded my system.

I remember the windshield crumpling and a cocoon of impact sounds—a grind, a screech, a whoosh, a thud—surrounding me.

I remember the moment of absolute silence as I sat shaking right before I climbed out of the window of the SUV, body trembling with adrenaline, mind working in overdrive to figure out what had happened.

I remember walking away perfectly intact but for a few scrapes. I remember that I didn’t need to go to the hospital. I remember that my concussion was so minor that I only ever got a few headaches in the aftermath. I remember that I didn’t need stiches or even band aids. I remember that I wasn’t sore. Like, at all. I remember waking up the next morning alive and well—extremely well, unnaturally well.

That SUV rolled twice before it landed right side up, but I was completely all right.

I remember that God preserved me, that he kept me safe when I shouldn’t have been safe, that his hand covered me so much that I have no scars from that accident.

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I remember other times when God has proved his faithfulness to me, even though he is never under an obligation to bless me, even though he doesn’t need me to be safe or happy, even though he doesn’t need me at all.

I remember opening the email that told me a magazine had acquired my first short story. I remember the rush of elation so potent it brought tears. I remember talking long with God about it, trying to express my excitement and thankfulness and wonder because he never had to give me a gift like that. But he did.

I remember wrestling with God over the eleven months of rejections that followed that happy day. I remember what he taught me about myself and himself in those rejections. I remember how he gradually recalibrated my goals and ideas of success.

I remember who I was a year ago today, and I see all the ways God has grown me. I remember my bone-deep pride and my faithlessness, and I remember how he’s remade me again and again, each time with a little less of my old nature.

I remember the season of my life when I was hopelessly entangled with sin and all the depression that came with it. I remember how God pursued me, always had grace for me, made me brave enough to do what I had to do to be free of that sin.

I remember walking through wastelands, and I remember the sudden, intense floods of joy and hope and truth that God rained down upon me.

I remember times of striking loneliness where God met with me, was a friend to me.

I remember the trials of these last few years and how God was walked before me, behind me, and with me through all of it.

I remember being overwhelmed by the weight of how sinful I still am—the pride, the faithlessness, the fear, the selfishness—and thinking to myself, “How will I ever see God?” only to have him take the weight from me and remind me that Jesus finished it—all of it—on that cross.

I remember blanching at the thought of the future only to have him take me deeper than my feet could ever wander.

I remember asking for a new heart, and I remember him giving it.

I remember so many things—the person I have been but am no longer, the times in my life where I couldn’t make it, the heart-breaking twists that crushed me, the impossible coming to pass, the blessings from his hand for no other reason than because he loves me and wants me to know it in new ways, the friendships that have fallen apart and the pain they brought but looking back and seeing why, the pulling through when I didn’t have it in me but he had more than enough.

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Remembrance.

If we do not make remembrance a habit, our heart of gratitude flatlines, and our faith and hope wither. It is in the practice of looking back—in remembering specifically what God has done in and for us personally—that we are reminded of God’s faithfulness.

We are creatures so prone to forgetfulness. I can forget in the afternoon the joy of meeting with God I had in the morning. I can forget in a couple of months the despair of being caught in sin. I can forget in a few days the urgency that should trademark how I approach evangelism. I can forget in a few minutes to love of God when a trial comes.

But I cannot—I must not—forget.

When the trial comes, we must remember who God has said and shown himself to be. When our wonder is gone, we must remember who God has said and shown himself to be. When our hope withers, we must remember who God has said and shown himself to be. When our faith dies, we must remember who God has said and shown himself to be.

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But how can we remember?

We must build a memorial beside every Jordan river that God leads us across. He gives us the rocks from his very hand, the stones that build our faith and hope and joy and love if only we remember them.

They are massive boulders. They are little pebbles. And they all build up, help us to understand in our hearts and our heads and delight ourselves in God’s goodness and faithfulness and love, readying us for when his blessings aren’t so apparent.

They are little moments of wonder, and they are life-changing events, and they are weeks and months of growth.

They are the encouraging texts out of the blue.

They are the moments when the presence of the Holy Spirit is undeniably tangible.

They are the massive, unexpected, unnecessary win at work.

They are the conversation with a friend.

They are the peonies with their hundreds of petals in full bloom.

They are the truth we are suddenly, powerfully reminded of down to our core.

They are the old friend who is still a good friend despite the time and distance.

They are the passage of Scripture that comes alive.

They are the hug of a sister.

They are the prayer of a brother.

They are the healing and forgiveness after so much hurt.

They are the fireflies flickering on a summer night.

They are the safety in a dangerous place.

They are the song for the dark of night.

They are the deep sleep that refreshes and renews.

They are the victory when it seemed the fight was lost.

They are the hearts being transformed into the image of Jesus all around us.

They are the remaking of our own hearts day by day.

They are the cancer in remission.

They are the grandparent coming out of the hospital safe and sound.

They are the little things. They are the big things. They are all the things in between. These are the stones with which we build our memorials, our altars of remembrance.

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My memorial is made mainly of paper and ink.

I journal to remember, and I keep a notebook of thanksgiving. I also make playlists, and each song reminds me of something specific from different seasons of life.

On July 6—the anniversary of my accident—I buy flowers, and I set aside a little while to think back, to journal, to pray, and to worship. It’s special not because of the flowers or even because I’m alive and well and happy to be; it’s special because on that day I remember well the sovereignty and faithfulness and grace and love and power of my God.

So I encourage you—I challenge you—to remember what your memorial is made of. I challenge you to regularly identify the individual rocks and gravel bits that have built up your altar of remembrance.

Remember who God has said and shown himself to be in his Word and how he’s confirmed it in your life.

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I would love to hear from you. What are some things—big and small—that you remember? How do you remember—do you journal or make photo albums or something else entirely?

With much love,

Rosalie

P.S. – Here’s the original post I wrote after my accident in 2016, if you’re interested.

P.P.S. – The whole account of the crossing of the Jordan is pretty spectacular; Joshua 1-5 gives a fairly comprehensive picture of the situation.

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July 2, 2018

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The Get To Know Me Tag [writer’s edition]

Happy Monday, friends!

Today I am finally (finally finally) doing a tag that has been sticking to me for a few months now. Way back in March (or something like that), the lovely Savannah Grace tagged me with The Get to Know Me Tag: Writer’s Edition, and I am finally doing it.

So here we are.

The rules:

  • link back to the person who created the tag (Savannah)
  • thank the person who tagged you (Savannah)
  • tag eleven bloggers (I don’t know if I can do eleven, but we’ll see)

Fun fact about Savannah:

She and I are Splickety buddies! Her flash fiction, Shoot Straight, and my flash fiction, Our Family, were published in the same issue of Splickety!

And she’s since been published with Splickety twice. Yeah, she’s that cool.

And now for me actually doing the tag (question: is that what we call it? “Doing” a tag? Or participating in a tag? Or something else????).

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[Vital Stats & Appearance]

(pen)Name: Rosalie Valentine (it also happens to be my real name).

Nicknames: Rosie, Rose, Seeta, Honeywheat, and Sourdough (thank you for those last three, brothers).

Birthday: July 30, 1998 (aka: I’m very close to leaving my teen years behind me, which is oddly somewhat unsettling).

Hair color and length: Brown and down to my lower back (and straight like there’s no tomorrow; it won’t hold a curl or wave for more than half a day so woe is me if my life one day depends on having texture in these brown locks).

Eye color: Hazel!

Braces/piercings/tattoos: Pierced ears (I got my ears pierced for my fifth birthday).

Righty or lefty: Righty all the way (though who hasn’t had the ambidextrous dream?).

Ethnicity: A lot of European blood with just a little Cherokee mixed in.

[Firsts]

First novel written: Truly, a Cinderella retelling novella (and that was right before it got cool to write retellings).

First novel completed: I’m not sure if setting aside a story because it is irreparable counts as completing it, but we’ll just go with that. That would be Truly as well.

Award for writing: N/A

First publication: A flash fiction for Havok magazine back in 2017 titled The Necklace. It’s still one of my favorite stories I’ve written. :)

Conference: Realm Makers 2015!!! This is where I first met Katie Grace for the first time! I literally cannot imagine my writing life without Katie because she inspires and encourages me in so. many. ways.

And I finally met Nadine Brandes at RM 2015 after I was on the launch team for A Time to Die (A Time to Speak was coming out in just a few months at that point, and I was DYING with questions). And I got to ask Steve Laube a bunch of questions in a mentoring session. And I met Victoria and Jordan there too! And Jill Williamson for another mentoring session!! So many amazing things happened at Realm Makers 2015. :)

Query/Pitch: Possibly False Gods by the end of this year. We’ll see where it’s at after this draft and then what alphas and betas think. But guys, my heart is so ready for the world to meet these characters and this story; I cannot wait to see what God does with it (especially since it’s the most direct, not-subtle-at-all story I’ve ever written).

[Favorites]

Novel (that you wrote): Lol, False Gods for sure.

Genre: Between flash fictions and novels, I’ve dabbled in science fiction, various kinds of fantasy, contemporary, and YA. My default seems to be fantasy, but there’s a sci-fi story-possibly-novel that I am dying to write.

Author: Just one? It’s impossible. I’ll go with two—Anne Elisabeth Stengl and Nadine Brandes.

Writing Music: It really varies on the story! A lot of my stories/characters have tailored playlists depending on the genre and situation. Lots of film scores (Hans Zimmer and Trevor Rabin are some of my favorite composers).

Time To Write: Early morning or late night it seems.

Writing Snack/Drink: Gummy bears, granola bars, coffee with enough cream to make it tasty, chai or lavender lattes, and water.

Movie: This is where I cannot do one or even two. Prepare for a list, kids. The Dark Knight trilogy, The Lord of the Rings trilogy, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, and The Lion King.

Writing Memory: Hmmmm, this is an interesting one. My favorite writing related memory was probably when I got the email telling me that Havok wanted to acquire The Necklace.

My favorite memory of writing is probably when I drafted the climax scenes for False Gods. So much of me and what I’ve learned about God is in the story and the themes and the characters, and so when it was all coming together for the first time, it was all rushing from my heart to my fingers in a way that doesn’t happen very often.

Childhood Book: The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis and the Tales of Goldstone Wood by Anne Elisabeth Stengl are my childhood.

[Currently]

Reading: Fawkes by Nadine Brandes (which, by the way, releases in less than two weeks!!!!).

Writing: A flash fiction to submit for the Realm Makers live critique and False Gods editing/revising.  The flash fiction has to be 300 words or less, and it’s related to one of my other stories (but I won’t say which because it would be so fun/cool for you guys to one day figure out which story/character it’s connected to). And my project for Camp NaNo this July is False Gods again. We’ll see how it goes with Realm Makers in the middle of it.

Listening to: The Piano Guys because I somehow forgot about them for two years and just rediscovered them last week! And re-listening to my 2018 and worship playlists a lot recently.

Watching: Lost in Space—the new one that Netflix made. I’ve seen four episodes and like it so far!

Learning: To have faith over fear and to dream better regarding everything, including my writing life.

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(how did you not see this gif coming?)

[Future]

Want To Be Published: Yes! So very much! … but I’m in no rush. I keep submitting short stories and working on novels, but it’s not consuming like it used to be. If I get published again, it will be when God wants it to be, with the story he wants it to be, and with the publisher he wants it to be. Until then, I’m at my leisure.

Indie or Traditional: It varies! For novels, I want try for traditional first, but as far as some short stories/flash fiction collections, those might be self-published.

Wildest Goal: Get False Gods published and into the hands of people like me, who have doubts and struggles like me, who need to hear Asha and Adele’s stories like I have. My best hope and prayer for my writing right now is that God will use False Gods to do in others what he’s used it to do in me.

It’s crazy how much Jesus has changed my desires and goals for writing over the years. At one time (and sometimes still), success was writing and selling lots of books; now success is writing stories with God and seeing what he does with them—in me and in others.

I hereby tag:

Thank you so much for tagging me, Savannah! This was fun!

What about you? What is your childhood book/series? And leave your strangest nickname in the comments too, because I need to know. ;)

With love,

Rosalie

P.S. – another memo of High Command is going out this Friday (not last Friday like I said it would on Instagram because I forgot that last Friday was still in June and that it won’t be the first Friday of July until this Friday. #oops)

P.P.S. – anyone else kind of appalled that it’s July 2 today? Like, where has the first half of the year gone? Riddle me that.

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May 7, 2018

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Camp NaNoWriMo & All That Jazz [aka: an explosion of all my craziness about my WIP]

April Camp NaNoWriMo came to a close last Monday, and I’m happy to say it was a successful month for me!

[Warning: Kat from Sparks of Ember gave me permission to just be myself here on Penprints, so the proverbial hair is coming down. Prepare yourself for a super casual post full of run-on sentences and my explosive excitement for my WIP.]

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Now, for those of you wondering what Camp NaNoWriMo is, here’s the short version: “NaNoWriMo” is slang for “National Novel Writing Month”. National Novel Writing Month is a virtual event that takes place every November where writers around the world try to write 50,000 words in 30 days.

Camp NaNoWriMo takes place in April and July and has a similar idea except you can join virtual cabins with nineteen other writers where you can chat, compare your goals, word war and such. And speaking of goals, you set your goal any way you want for Camp. Lines, hours, minutes, words, pages, etc.

I had planned to continue pulling teeth working on Beasts for Camp NaNoWriMo, and I set myself a goal of 55 hours. Three days before Camp started, I decided that Beasts and I needed to take a break and come back to reevaluate our relationship after we both had some time away (why, yes, I did just refer to Beasts and I as a “we”, as if Beasts was another person and not a figment of my imagination. #unashamed) Unfortunately, at present, it seems like it’s a toxic relationship. Hopefully this detox from each other will bring us around to a better state of mind and heart. Hopefully.

So I had to scramble for a project for Camp. Should I just write a bunch of flash fictions? Finish a sci-fi short story that’s been rolling around in my head for months? Revisit Flickering Lights and finally make decisions about its fate? Not do Camp at all??

Ha. None of that happened.

Instead, I went straight for False Gods, the novel I drafted last November (during normal NaNoWriMo). Because I’d been dying to get back to it (no, I have not been mentally cheating on Beasts, hush) since December 1, 2017.

So I stowed my Beasts notes and playlist and pulled up the False Gods Pinterest board, the character playlists, and the embarrassingly rough first draft that I somehow still adore even though it’s a complete mess.

An Example Of What A Mess This First Draft Is:

*second week of NaNoWriMo 2017*

*in the midst of drafting False Gods for the first time*

*my small group was also in the midst of a study on the book of Acts and we had just finished the part where Paul is on Malta, a snake comes out of the fire, bites him in the hand, the natives expect him to swell up and die, and then he doesn’t die because God*

Me: *whining* I don’t know why this character is going on this trip with them! I don’t want him on this trip! He ruins the whole dynamic!

Daddy: What if a viper bites him, he swells up, and dies?

Me: Haha, psh. You’re cute. No, I would never do that. *laughs* That would be ridiculous.

*literally 20 minutes later*

“… So-and-so let out a sharp cry. A viper hung from So-and-so’s calf…”

And yes, this character definitely swelled up and died on the spot. Problem = solved. Don’t worry, kids. I’m a professional.

Anyway, April began with a huge bang and kept right on steamrolling. About halfway through, I lowered my goal from 55 hours to 50 hours because there were a few days when I had far better things to do than work on False Gods (and if I’m saying that about The Novel That I Love, you know it’s true).

With the help of my amazing cabin, I made it to my goal of 50 hours by the end of April, and I made so much progress!… sort of… okay, so, looking back at where False Gods was at the start of April, I’m like, “Woah!! I’ve done so much work on it! It’s come so far! Woohoo! FULL SPEED AHEAD!”… but then when I think about having spent 50 hours (50 HOURS) of work on it, I’m like, “How is this all that’s gotten done in 50 freaking hours of work??!”.

So here we are.

I’m going to briefly share a few things—we’ll  call them fun facts—that have happened with False Gods over the month of April.

  • I read and annotated the first draft.
  • Existing plot points and new plot points went on index cards and were arranged into the semblance of a plot. (Side note: why the heck do we even have plots? Who needs them? *distant sobbing*)
  • I dug into Asha (my main character who I adore) and his past, figuring out more of his history and emotional wounds and such. (Hint: hurt people hurt people, people.)
  • I dug into Adele (my secondary POV character) and her past a little more, but she’s been in my head longer than Asha, so I already knew more of her history, but I was able to smooth some things out with her.
  • Asha and Adele were classified and explored according to their personality. Asha’s a rebel according to the four tendencies and a ESTP according to the Meyers-Briggs system. Adele’s an upholder according to the four tendencies and an ISFJ according to Meyers-Briggs. (Yeah, they ended up as almost complete opposites. #oops.)
  • While working on Asha’s brain, I compiled a list of his flaws and his virtues because that’s what professionals do. It turns out that he has eight flaws and counting. His only virtue is his wicked sense of humor, which I don’t think actually counts, especially since “wicked” describes it perfectly.
  • Despite how depraved it turns out Asha is, I still like him, and I think other people will too.
  • Adele, on the other hand, has seven virtues and counting with only three flaws.
  • I cemented down some of the major history for my storyworld (particularly, Asha’s heritage).
  • I finished sorting through an entire book of baby names and compiled a complete list of characters and why they’re there.
  • I revised the first sixteen chapters (part one) of False Gods.
  • A rough map of the storyworld has been drawn.
  • I did some focused work on Adele’s POV voice and settled on a tone that suits her.
  • 47 hours into Draft Two, I finally came roaring out of the honeymoon phase with False Gods (meaning: I started to despair about how much work it needs, began to hate it, etc.).
  • 52 hours into Draft Two, I zipped right back into the honeymoon phase. (Something about these characters, people. I can’t hate them or ignore them.)
  • I realized that False Gods is indeed the correct title for this story. If you remember from my recap post from NaNoWriMo 2017, I wasn’t sure if it suited Asha’s story after I brought Adele out of her story and into his. Spoiler alert: oh, it works.
  • Speaking of Asha’s story, I also figured out that Asha is indeed my main character. One would think I would have already known this, but alas. For a while there, I wasn’t sure which of them was my main character because they both have so much at stake, are so dear to me, etc., etc.. But then I realized that this isn’t about the mortal who goes toe-to-toe with an immortal pantheon; this is about the immortal who gets defeated by a mortal. This is about a dude who actually thinks he’s a god and all the lies he believes that have to be unraveled for him to become truly great. So, yeah, that was just nice to finally get sorted out in my brain.
  • False Gods is not subtle. At all. Most of my flash fictions have been fairly indirect in how they reflect Christ. That’s not at all the case with False Gods; the themes are very direct, born from a season in my life that’s felt like a spiritual wilderness. I’ve come to terms with the fact that while I want to write subtle fiction, False Gods is just not one of those stories. It never has been, and it never will be.

Anyhoo. That was a crazy long post, and it’s not even helpful or anything like that. It’s just me spazzing my way from one thought about April and False Gods to another like a rabbit on caffeine (Out of Time series reference, yo).

Part of me is like, “Oh, this level of hyper is probably incoherent and/or annoying”, but then the rest of me is like, “Lol, do it anyway.”.

SO. This is one of the things I’m super jazzed about right now. What is something you’re excited about right now? A project? A trip? A novel?

With love,

Rosalie

P.S. – thanks again to Kat for telling me I don’t always “have to be on” here on the ol’ blog.

P.P.S. – don’t forget to sign-up for the 2018 Penprints Flash Fiction Dash and check out the giveaway that’s currently running.